A Real Mountain Bike

spacetimepirate — Wed, 25 Mar 2009 06:59:24 +0000

I have a bike that’s pretty new. It’s useful for riding to fast food places, stores, and to appointments with my time-management coach. Last Friday as I left the building to return home, there were a man and a woman, in their 60′s I’d say, examining my bike, which I had locked to a bench. One of them commented that it was a real nice bike and asked me if I rode it in the mountains. I said no, I just rode it to the store and back. “That’s a real mountain bike,” the man said, matter-of-factly, as though his pronouncement would make me realize how woefully I was underusing the bike’s potential. I told them it was a cheap bike from Target. After politely answering a few more of their questions, I rode off. I didn’t tell them it had already had a flat tire and still had a broken gearshift. They looked at me as I rode away, too. Not really sure what to make of it, other than that these were rather nosy people.

This isn’t meta, I promise.

spacetimepirate — Mon, 23 Mar 2009 05:36:33 +0000

When one has nothing to talk about, what does one do? Talk about having nothing to talk about, of course. As Ford Prefect once observed, “If they [humans] don’t keep on exercising their lips, their brains start working.” But this, my first non-introductory post, won’t be one of those meta-things wherein I lament the lack of subject matter. On the contrary, the world is brimming with subject matter. I just don’t know what to say about it. What business have I writing a blog, then? Well, I’m a sneaky one. Since I don’t want to write about anything, I’ll just post something I wrote in the past. In this case, it’s a short sci-fi story I wrote in 90 minutes one night.

May 16, 2012
Today I decided to run away from home. Things were just getting so out of hand that I decided to just up and leave. I left a note on my bed in my room for my parents so that they wouldn’t think I’d been abducted and call the cops. Well, they might do that anyway, but I don’t plan on being found by any mere cop. I have enough food to last a week or so, so until then I can just camp out here in the wilderness. Handy, that. Wilderness. I might even be able to find some stuff to eat out here. Fruits and berries, at least. I don’t think I could hunt down some poor innocent little animal.

May 17, 2012
The first night wasn’t so bad, although I woke up with some itchy bug bites. I’ll put that on the list of things to buy next time I find myself back in civilization. I’m pretty tired tonight; I guess the initial rush from running away has worn off. Even though I didn’t do anything today except sit around and draw in the dirt (in the process getting my hands completely dirty).

May 18, 2012
Weirdo that I am, I brought along a bunch of my schoolwork so I wouldn’t get behind while I was away. I finished one of my math assignments. I was going to do history but I forgot to bring the book. I wonder what everyone at school thinks about me? I mean, I just kind of vanished from school one day. I’m already kind of known as the crazy kid. So I’m not sure how this will really change their perception of me. Also of note: I took a bath in the creek that runs by my house and put on my other pair of clothes. Er, set. The water was reeeeeally cold.

May 19, 2012
I decided that I needed to travel to stave off boredom. I headed north past highway 58. It’s really easy to travel when there’s no pressure to be anywhere within a certain time. I just stop and rest whenever I want. It’s actually pretty fun. I slept with my jacket on to keep the bugs off of me at night, but they’re still biting my face. I should go buy some bug spray soon. Also, some more food. I suppose I could buy some cookable things and then cook them. I could also buy matches to make making fire easier.

May 21, 2012
Last night I went to a store and bought things. I tried to make sure not to attract attention. I went late at night when there weren’t many people there. But even so, what’s the chance any given person is going to remember me from the news (assuming I’m even on the news)? I have some more granola bars, Spaghetti-O’s, and some apples. Yeah, I couldn’t really find anything to eat out in the woods. Anyway, apples and Spaghetti-O’s taste really good when you’ve had nothing but granola and water for five days.

May 22, 2012
It’s kind of nice out here communing with nature and all, but I miss my friends from home. I thought about calling home and letting them know I was all right, but I was really tired, so I decided to just go to bed.

May 23, 2012
Last night there was some huge loud crashing noise. I don’t know what it was. There wasn’t anything else weird going on. Oh, I did find a cool metal ring thing. I guess that could be weird. Ok, it is weird. But it looks old, so I don’t think it was related.

June 3, 2012
I’m back at home, somehow. I don’t remember anything. Mom and Dad aren’t angry, they’re just really happy to see me. They won’t tell me anything about what happened, though.

June 5, 2012
Mom and Dad say I have to stay at home for a while because I’m sick. I don’t feel sick, though. Just really tired.

May 25, 2012
Ok, this is seriously the freakiest thing ever. I don’t remember writing those last 2 entries. I’ve been out here in the woods the whole time. My watch says it’s the 25th. What’s going on? Oh, and now I have 2 metal rings.

June 6, 2012
Someone’s banging on the door to my room, and I don’t want to let them in. I’m too scared to go to the door. They stopped after a few minutes. But there’s no way I’m leaving the room.

May 26, 2012
My watch is broken now. So I’m just guessing that it’s the 26th. I don’t know who’s writing these other entries. I don’t really want to go back. I want to solve this on my own, especially since the me that went back doesn’t seem to be doing so well.

Another Night
I’m having some kind of a pain in my stomach, or in my intestines. It only shows up when I walk a lot. I’m thinking of calling my friend Roy to help me figure out what the hell is going on.

Another Night
I had a dream last night where I was floating in water, and then these fish came and attacked me. I was trying to hit at them, but I couldn’t because they were too fast. My pain is still there.

Another Night
I woke up this morning to find my backpack full of not one, not two, but eighteen metal rings. I threw them all away. Before I did that I noticed they said “Property of Monella Corp.” I hope they don’t come back. Pretty soon I’m going to have to buy more food.

25 JAN 2133
Today was ok I guess. Boring, though. This hydroponics class I’m taking is kinda cool, but everything else is dumb.

Another Night
Well, what should I expect? Now I’m writing from the future. What’s next? Robot versions of me? Alternate universes? I’m just about ready to go back home and find out what’s going on. But who’ll believe me?

Another Night
I spent the day in the hospital or something. I was really woozy all day. I don’t remember much. I’ve now lost track of what day it is. I think I’m out of the woods, at least.

Another Night
The nice people at the Institute gave me some ice cream and hot chocolate after my operation. I’m going home tomorrow.

Welcome

spacetimepirate — Thu, 19 Mar 2009 01:46:24 +0000

Hello and welcome! This is the official captain’s log of the feared Space-time Pirate. (That’s me!) What you’ll find here are my thoughts on issues of social justice; science, mathematics, and academia; psychology; the Internet and its most famous offspring, the Web; video games; popular culture; and assorted geeky/nerdy things.

Till next time,
Space-Time Pirate

Space-Time Pirate's Log

A Real Mountain Bike

This isn’t meta, I promise.

Welcome